learn yourself narfuck

Riviera · Post by **Riviera** » Sat Feb 28, 2004 11:47 am

"Learn Yerself Norfolk" by Sid Kipper
Here's a selection of words which could just confuse the unwary.

Unwary - not tired.
Bare - an alcoholic beverage normally served in pints or half pints.
Cuckoo - a chocolate bedtime drink.
Crick - a narrow coastal inlet.
Bud - a feathered biped.
pear - to peep or look closely.
Ton up - a root vegetable.
Winder - a glassed opening in a wall to admit light.
Pitcher - a framed likeness, often portrait or landscape.
Gnu - fresh, not known before.
Sick more - a type of deciduous tree.
Moss could - a system of signalling with dots and dashes.
Hull - to throw, or toss.

And finally...
Chary-oh - The Singing Postman's catch phrase

just seen this on twtd

Riviera · Post by **Riviera** » Sat Feb 28, 2004 12:00 pm

Also from TWTD

I swear I am not making this up...
Thursford Christmas Spectacular

some choice quotes...

"One of Norfolk's most spectacular showcases has a home in a barn, in a field, in the middle of nowhere - and thousands come to visit the Thursford Spectacular every year.

The show runs twice daily at 2pm and 7pm until 23 December. Tickets are priced at Ã‚Â£18.50 with a booking fee for credit card transactions."

Bargain!

"Who would expect to find a sparkling Christmas Spectacular, attended by coachloads of people from all over the country, staged in a large farm shed in the middle of Norfolk?"

Is it at Carrow Road?

"There are some 80 to 90 musical items, which range from fully choreographed song and dance routines, and choral interludes, to the sound of the mighty Wurlitzer and a piped band."

AND a piped band?!?!?

"The prize for exuberance goes to percussionist Daniel Ellis, who practically sets light to his xylophone, he gives it so much welly."

What, he literally hits it with a welly? Cool.

"If I had any criticism, it would be that the show is too long - it's three hours including the interval."

How can this much fun be too long?

"Hanging from the roof are a huge model reindeer, crystal balls and gallopers from the fairground roundabouts...
It is every child's fantasy, and it's here in Norfolk."

Yeah baby!

"Cynics need not attend."

Oh.

Here`s the proof...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/norfolk/stage/revi ... 2003.shtml

fatty28uk · Post by **fatty28uk** » Sat Feb 28, 2004 12:43 pm

PMSL
This is spot on...embarrassing, but true.

Ps.
It helps to understand the 'Thursford mentality' if you were born around the turn of the century......... no not this one.....the previous one.